View Full Version : Xerxes' INNAPROPRIATE responses...
30th December 2000, 05:37
A situation, and the incorrect thing to say.
Friend: Well, I just got back from a weekend at my grandmother's house...
You: Oooohhh! Kinky!!! mmmm....
30th December 2000, 05:42
"I just burned some really cool CDs..."
"Dude! What'd you do that for?! You're supposed to burn weed, not CDs!"
30th December 2000, 09:52
Situation : ANother phone call from a gym offering premium discounts.
Innapropriate Response : "Sorry, but I am paraplegic".
30th December 2000, 18:27
A coworker comments on how she thinks "the office coffee
is real good today"
you say "Well, then thank GOD for Saddam Hussein!"
31st December 2000, 02:52
You get pulled over for speeding...
"Can I see your lisence and registration please?"
"Yeah, it's in my wallet... Could you hold my beer while I get it?"
31st December 2000, 08:43
you are in major trouble for this, etc
its not that serious
edit - be a lot funnier if u knew the story... too lazy to type it
31st December 2000, 17:42
Situation: In a romantic resteraunt your Blind Date asks "So tell me about yourself"
Response: " Well... I was born with both sets of Genitalia... JUST KIDDING! "
1st January 2001, 20:46
Situation : Bill Clinton asks if you have a cigar.
Innapropraite Respons : "Yes sir, would you care for a drag?"
1st January 2001, 21:46
Situation: You are in an airport, entering a foreign country
Q:May i see your passport please?
8th January 2001, 04:24
Sorry too oppose the whole thing here but well aaahhhh just shut up and read
A man in a trench coat drives up jumps out of the car and does the full monty right in front of you
HOLY SHIT what do you call that??
I would say it was a penis if I didn't know better
8th January 2001, 04:29
ok ok I admit it that was lame but oh well
Here I will make it up:
Really hot guy(or girl for all you people of the male genitia(to steel Heathers phrase for lack of a better one)walks up to you in a bar and askes you if the seat next to you is taking
YES DON'T YOU DARE SIT THERE!!!!!!
*look down at the seat*
How are ya doing little green dude from the plant X another beer for ya???
9th January 2001, 00:13
Q. Are you interested in burial plots?
A. Sorry, I'm not dead. (actually did that to a telemarketer)
11th January 2001, 04:42
telemarketer: Sir, are you interested in switching to our long distance plan ?
Me: Well, I don't really need long distance, cuz after I hang up with you, I'm going to kill myself.
Ha ha ha...I thought it was funny
13th January 2001, 04:12
A drunk and very smelly guy walks up to me in a karaoke bar and asks if I would like to sing a song with him...
My appropriate response..."No, thank you."
So then he asks me if I have any requests...
My inappropriate response..."Sure, I have a request. Why don't you fuck off and sober up!"
13th January 2001, 09:20
Under the circumstances, that sounds about the right response.
23rd January 2001, 01:10
Q - Is this your liquor?
A - Yeah, but I haven't had any of it. I gave it all to the chick passed out in the back seat orficer.
Used to telemarket for MCI. Signed a thing that said I can't even talk about it but fuck 'em cause I turn 18 Sat so I'm gonna break the law before they can get me (hard). One chick asked me if I would meet her. She sounded a good bit older. I told her to look out the window at the red car. She shit her pants.
"My rule for when you ride w/ me: Ass, Gas, or Grass- nobody gets a free ride."
29th January 2001, 02:19
Q. May i see your drivers license?
A. Now thats a problem.......
30th January 2001, 09:59
How many people work here?
Oh, about half!
19th March 2001, 17:12
you see on the news that your church has burnt down over night, you wife and freinds state thats horrible - but your response is
"Great, now my sunday's free to go to the bar & get some puff puff give going!"
25th March 2001, 02:27
Situation - Someone asks you how's it going?
Response - Better than Tito Jackson eating a banana and combing Mr.T's hair with a giant spork!!!!
Note- Tito Jackson, banana, Mr.T, and spork are the funniest words ever
26th March 2001, 08:17
Situation: In a crowded airport over Easter Vacation with Mom, Dad, Sis, and the family cat all drugged out in his little carrier case.
Wrong thing to say: Jeesh, Mom, I sure hope we remembered to pack the bomb!
26th March 2001, 08:20
Situation: Sitting at home in your comfortable bathtub, playing in the bubble bath, reading your favorite Romance Novel, when suddenly, the door bell rings.
Innapropriate thing to do: Run down the stairs naked except for a few clinging bubbles, unlock the door, stick your head out, and yell as loud as you can, 'BING FUCKING BONG' only to find out its your mother, returning your drugged out cat from the border patrol.
4th April 2001, 10:57
Situation: Cop pulls you over for swerving.
bad response: Oh sorry officer, I was just reaching for my bag of crack when my gun slipped out of my hands and knocked over my beers.
11th April 2001, 17:05
Your girlfriend comes to you crying, "I can't believe it. Some sick freaks dug up my grandmother's grave and stole her body. The police don't even know why." *sob*
"Did I ever mention that I'm a necrophiliac?"
19th April 2001, 23:21
Your asleep in class the teacher taps you on the head to wake you up.
You: NO DADDY DON'T TOUCH ME THERE THATS MY SPECIAL AREA
9th November 2001, 10:22
Woah! WolfieD posting before even registered! Wow!
30th November 2002, 20:19
Originally posted by jns
Woah! WolfieD posting before even registered! Wow!
As Emeril would say...
28th December 2002, 05:39
arise from the depths of hell, my pretty!
28th December 2002, 06:17
Situation: In A Bank passing the Teller a deposit slip.
Response: Yes, my name is Rob T. Bank
20th January 2003, 20:15
Situation: Bumped old Thread
Inappropriate Response: "Wow, my 3000th post! I need to get my life back, instead of rattling around here with you stupid fucks!"
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