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sgtfuzzbubble011
30th July 2001, 06:11
It's been a while since I bitched about shtuff... So I'm gonna bitch some more. :)

My bitch: People who drive that shouldn't because they suck ass.

I went to visit my mom the other day (she lives about 150 miles away). Needless to say, it's a long drive. I used to be a very cautious and courteous driver, but every time I have to deal with assmunches on the road, I turn into more and more of a jerk. And if I had an M1 battle-tank the other day on my way over, you'd be hearing about my rampages on the news. I think the one thing that pisses me off the most is people that won't get out of the fast lane and just hold you back. Then you can't go around them because there's other cars in the other lane. Ya just feel like ramming the shit out of them. I couldn't tell you how many times I wish I could have done that. Then there's the butt-surfers that like to cut you off. Grr. *Pulls out rocket launcher and blasts them*


Anyways, post the things that other crap-ass motorists do which absolutely make you crazy.

Xerxes
30th July 2001, 07:34
Freeways are quite competitive, but when people get REAL nasty is in "large-and-full-to-capacity-except-that-one elusive-space-that-20-cars-are-looking-for" parking lots... and then you finally eye someone pulling out in the middle of the lane and theres that car thats an equal amount of distance away who sees it too... then you race to the middle meanwhile not wanting to crash into the person pulling out but at the same time wanting to edge out the other person... what follows is that crucial 3 car-ballet sequence that decides who gets the space... not a place for
the faint of heart...

Parking lots full of heated human emotion and drama... :)

Mr. Bojanglez
30th July 2001, 07:47
i can't drive..

John M
30th July 2001, 12:46
what i really hate? old people who shouldnt be driving. theyre the most dangerous things on the road. sure, newbie drivers dont have much experience, but their reaction time is quicker.

i hate those dumbasses who ride thier bikes on the road. i mean, curvy, 2 lane, and these fools arre just toolin along on thier merry way. when less than 7 miles away is prolly one of the greatest bike trails in the country. and they wear those expensive little suits that are way tight as if to say 'dont hit me, i have money'. they piss me off.

The roads of america will not be safe until i'm there to take out the assholes with a rocket launcher.

s1138
30th July 2001, 14:20
hehe:D ahhh, good thing i dont have a car....
i would be a crazy driver.

true X, parking lots are where instinct kicks in:D

Nofx Guy
30th July 2001, 18:38
i hate it when peopl run across the road right in front of you,, i feel like speedin up and hitting them. also old people piss me off, they walk like extremely slow but then they get into a car that can go fast but they still go slow, they dont shoulder check, back up into things and do many other annoying things. all people over 65 should have to re-take there driving tests, i have a feelin most people over that age would fail

John M
30th July 2001, 18:58
Originally posted by s1138
hehe:D ahhh, good thing i dont have a car....
i would be a crazy driver.
D when my parents complain about the way other people drive, i say 'i promise i'll never do that' or 'thats some stupid shit right there' and thats the reason i'm getttin a car ;)

s1138
30th July 2001, 19:16
on trip, my mom tells me alot "dont drive like me"
:D

and then there is me, sitting in the passenger seat saying "get over, there is enough room....dont let him over...."

sgtfuzzbubble011
31st July 2001, 01:24
Ooh! Ooh! I forgot!

RVs should be fucking banned from the roads! :mad:

s1138
31st July 2001, 02:05
especially the ones with the thing sticking out the side...

Aeroe
31st July 2001, 03:05
driving for about only 16 months, and i still suck.
i wanna kill everyone; the whiteheads, those broke asses that have 12 kids in the back of the pickup, school buses, hippies driving foreign made electric cars and those bitches in minivans.

i'd love to run the bitches over in my gas guzzling SUV. and if i see those be damned liberals protesting any more 4x4's they can kiss my tire tread.

sgtfuzzbubble011
31st July 2001, 04:58
I'm gonna outfit my truck with all kinds of James Bond type thingers. I want some rocket launchers and tire spike dispensers and oil slick sprayers and machine guns and shtuffs. :D

Xerxes
31st July 2001, 06:33
A giant replica of a hand with a middle finger sticking out that pops out of your trunk at the touch of a button on your dash board would be more hilarious :)

Bilbo Baggins
31st July 2001, 09:43
Get a motorbike, and drive between the lanes...

John M
31st July 2001, 13:17
i also hate people who ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

s1138
31st July 2001, 13:50
lol:D

asshole
31st July 2001, 16:30
Gotta be the people who brake half a block before the red light. They keep moving some hundred feet with their brake lights on.
There are those who stop so far from the car in front that I couldn't fit into the left turn lane. If they had moved up, I would have gotten in easily.
Also the ones who are a combination of both. They are in the far left lane and they brake half a block away. They take their time moving up so that by the time I was able to fit into the left turn lane, the light had already changed to green and back to red.

There are also those who brake right in the middle of the road for no reason. They don't stop or change lane, but they brake. :confused:

sgtfuzzbubble011
31st July 2001, 16:37
I think I'm gonna get one of these (http://www.peterbilt.com/images/gal_l_379_8.jpg) and see if anyone dares to cut me off again. :D

sgtfuzzbubble011
1st August 2001, 22:25
Actually... this (http://www.battletanks.com/images/SU-100_L_gun-2.jpg) would work a little better, I think. :D

NeoRenegade
2nd August 2001, 15:35
I hate motherfuckers who talk on their cel-phones while driving.

I hate motherfuckers who use the emergency lane or shoulder as their own personal passing lane.

I hate people who change lanes as they're turning at an intersection, especially because they never look when they're doing it. Once a woman doing that came within inches of slamming into the side of our car, and when my father (driving) honked the horn, the bitch gave him a really fucking weird and annoying look as if he was the bad driver. So I rolled down the window real quick, gave them the finger real flashy-like, and yelled "Fuck you cocksucking whore!!!"
I'm sure she didn't exactly enjoy having that yelled at her, especially with her elementary-school-age children in the backseat with the window open.

Oh the fun I'm going to have road-raging when I learn to drive... and buy a pellet- or paintball-gun :D
"Hey, that mofo cut me off!" *roll* *paf* *paf* *paf* *vroom!* :D:D:D
mwahahaha... of what fun that would be... if only I didn't get in deep shit for it :(

dlinkwit27
2nd August 2001, 21:58
what is fun, but can be dangerous, is to when your on the freeway, throw pennies out the window at the car behind you. this is especially effective if you get cut off or the fast lane is being blocked. just speed up in front of the car, then let 'em fly. o, if u do this, and get caught, you didn't hear it from me :wink:

sgtfuzzbubble011
3rd August 2001, 02:56
Marbles work better. :D

dlinkwit27
3rd August 2001, 02:59
ya, but don't marbles cast more than pennies?

dlinkwit27
3rd August 2001, 03:01
i am the only person who uses the "Post Subject" thing. [the bold words above]. why?

sgtfuzzbubble011
3rd August 2001, 03:18
The reason why is because it's an optional field except when starting a new thread, and it usually makes the forums look a little more cluttered if it's used too much. :)

And yes, pennies are cheaper than marbles. BUT, ball bearings are pretty cheap too. :D

dlinkwit27
3rd August 2001, 03:33
i think that they make the forum neater, they seperaate the diff. posts. o well...

John M
3rd August 2001, 12:33
Originally posted by sgtfuzzbubble99
And yes, pennies are cheaper than marbles. BUT, ball bearings are pretty cheap too. :D and those you can steal from your father's place of work :D makes em even cheaper :p

the real Slade
3rd August 2001, 17:24
back onto the topic of driving i just got a $350 (aust)
speeding fine and 6 points off my licence and im on my P
plates so i've probbably lost my licence on one fine... :(

trust me to do it better than anyone else i know... :)

ElChevelle
3rd August 2001, 17:38
Originally posted by NeoRenegade
I hate motherfuckers who talk on their cel-phones while driving.

"Can you drive better with that phone stuck up your ass?"

John M
3rd August 2001, 20:20
i saw that bumper sticker yesterday at the parking lot at walmart.

ElChevelle
3rd August 2001, 22:04
I tried it once(talking on cell and driving), it's a bitch!!!
I drive a straighter line after a fifth of JD!;)

sgtfuzzbubble011
4th August 2001, 01:50
Idea: Get a hands-free headset fo yo fone.

:D

Trust me, they make life quite a bit easier...

dlinkwit27
4th August 2001, 02:37
the headset idea is cool, but...[there always is a but]...it is illeagle, at least where i live [Illinois].

Xerxes
4th August 2001, 13:02
There was a scientific experiment done- with 60 people.

20 were the "Control group" (So nothing was done to them)
20 were given enough alcohol to make them legally drunk
(according to the individual's body wieght)
20 were given a cell phone and were told to engage the
person on the cell phone in a discussion

The people were put into a room with a large TV that had
footage of someone driving- (the camera was placed so that
it was viewing through the windshield of the car)- and They
were told to keep their eyes on the road.

Afterwards there was a test done to see how much they had remembered- with not only questions about signs and streets
but also if there were any cars on their sides or if the
traffic was "heavy" etc etc etc.

The control group scored 60% on average
The intoxicated group scored 25%
THe cell phone group scored 30

Which means as far as observation goes (And the first rule of safe driving is to keep your eyes on the road...) , the cell phone people are marginally better than drunk drivers.

I've got to hand it to Europe- most of their countries have banned cell phones while driving.

dlinkwit27
4th August 2001, 17:00
I really don't think that that survey proves very much. I would have liked to have the drunks and talkers DRIVE a car. I mean, that is what determins how safe they are. Memory doesn't really matter when your driving. It is reaction time, ect.

D LiNK WiT

P.S. a similar experiment was done with drunks and people who were kept up 72 hours straight to see which was more dangerous. It found that it is more dangerous to drive asleep than drunk. just thought i'd share

Lucid DM
4th August 2001, 23:46
Well of course, 72 hours is a LOOONG time http://www.mear.fsnet.co.uk/grinblue.gif.
I mean, say if you're happily driving along, then you see a tree:
Drunk: Hmm? Large brown thing... =bad... TURN! AHHH!
Asleep:.... ... ... ... *CRASH*.
http://www.mear.fsnet.co.uk/grinblue.gif

Xerxes
5th August 2001, 07:24
It is my observation that drunk people are the people that drive too slow more often than not... and thats why the police always catch them :)

dlinkwit27
5th August 2001, 16:21
well, driving slow, and that whole, weaving from lane to lane kinda gives it a way sometimes. not to mention the, "i'm not as think you drunk i am."

Nofx Guy
7th August 2001, 17:34
from expierence a person who tries to prove that there drunk, usually get's caught but when a person just acts causual about it, nothin is usually done.

Jstalilwyrd
9th August 2001, 21:26
...here are my bitches:

- People who don't signal. Especially in a two-way intersection where you're usually there the whole afternoon.
- People who honk when you're doing the speed limit (like said). It's freaking 30, I'm doing 40, and I'm being honked. And it's an area where it's heavily patrolled.
- People who weave in heavy traffic. There's nothing more dumber than someone cutting in front of you while everyone's moving at a blazing 5 mph.
- People who leave their high beams on. It's enough I have to come out of my house and face the light of the sun. :)
- People on cell phones. I have one, but I keep it on silent when I'm driving because I want to watch out for others who don't pay any attention.
- Ass sniffers who try to get a racing draft off of me. [brake] *wham*
- Most racers. See ass sniffers. And most of their cars look foogly.

And I do not advise throwing anything out of the car. It's incredibly stupid and dangerous. I think Xerxes has heard about this around here in So. Cali where there used to be a string of acts where people would go on freeway overpasses and start throwing rocks and bricks onto oncoming traffic. Possibly the scariest shit I had heard in a long time. :eek:

Xerxes
10th August 2001, 06:12
Yes very dangerous! Driving in Southern california is truly an adventure... :eek:

That one that really scares me is that Gang initiation stunt where they have the initiate and another gangster go on the side of the freeway with their hazards on, and wait for some kind soul to help them. The initiate shoots the giy in the head to prove their mettle. Pure evil! :mad::eek::mad:

Jstalilwyrd
10th August 2001, 10:57
Heck, we had some idiot tie up US 101 today for the entire afternoon into nightfall after a standoff with the police. The last two weeks have had police chases worthy of a FOX special. It seems like anything in Southern California, people like to do copy-cat and then you get a rash of these things within a certain timeframe, and it's just so freaking annoying.

And that leads me to another bitch:

- Newscasts that devote the entire hour to cover a chase instead of having a smaller picture on the bottom of the screen and broadcasting "real" news (if that makes any sense) during it. The play-by-play during a chase is stupid, I mean everytime they do that, it's almost as if they assume you've never seen one in your life. That's why I'd rather read the paper or go online for my news. :)

Xerxes
10th August 2001, 12:42
What the heck else does local news have to report? If its not car chases its "Now here's a story that's dog-gone amazing! A southland dog (cut to dog video) ... oh look he's adorable - has learned to play "mary had a little lamb" on a special sized piano, and keep your paws off the remote, because comin up we have a true californian cat that can surf on his very own cute surfboard!"

:rolleyes: give me a frickin break, the local news is an ashtray: nothing good to be found in it ;)

Jstalilwyrd
10th August 2001, 12:58
So true. :D Maybe what we need is another earthquake. Nothing big. A 3.5 would be nice. :p Or I should move out of the county.

Xerxes
10th August 2001, 13:05
Oh yeah- just what we need. Every minor tremble from the earth and the so-cal local news is all "This was only 3.5, but will you be prepared when the big one hits? We'll give you tips straight from the "experts" on how to keep you and your family safe"

And they do it all like they've never ever done an earthquake saftety special before :p

asshole
10th August 2001, 16:27
Originally posted by NeoRenegade
I hate motherfuckers who talk on their cel-phones while driving.

I hate motherfuckers who use the emergency lane or shoulder as their own personal passing lane.


One of those motherfuckers hit my gf from behind while she was stopping at a red light.

I haven't seen this but I've seen fuckers who use the freeway merge lanes to pass.

Jstalilwyrd
10th August 2001, 17:41
Xerxes: Earthquake specials... haha. :D The only thing that can top that was the old Y2K preparedness thing, with the survival kits and water and power generators. LOL!

asshole: That blows. :( I hope she came out OK.

ElChevelle
10th August 2001, 18:45
Originally posted by asshole
One of those motherfuckers hit my gf from behind


Your girlfriend has kids?
Do you hit your gf from behind? Does she wail and moan? Or wimper and cry?

:D

Sorry, had to be done and I'm the doin' type;)

Jstalilwyrd
10th August 2001, 19:21
Ouch. :eek:

Bilbo Baggins
11th August 2001, 00:01
What makes it even funnier is the fact that asshole wrote it :p

asshole
11th August 2001, 05:23
Originally posted by Jstalilwyrd
asshole: That blows. I hope she came out OK.

She came out fine. That guy was lucky that she came out fine or I would have had his head (either one). But, I had to drive her around while her car was getting fixed. :(

Originally posted by ElChevelle


Your girlfriend has kids?
Do you hit your gf from behind? Does she wail and moan? Or wimper and cry?

:D

Sorry, had to be done and I'm the doin' type;)

We were talking about cars. When did the subject change? :confused:

No

No, but I kinda want to :D. Haven't done it, so don't know :(.

Man, you guys can be ruthless sometimes.

Bilbo Baggins
11th August 2001, 09:56
We could go a whole lot further.

Of course, we would send you the video.

ElChevelle
11th August 2001, 11:10
http://www.mpz.co.uk/cwm/otn/laughing/lol2.gif