View Full Version : Thieves, hang them all...

Mr Jones
19th September 2001, 17:10
Allow me to set the scene...

7.58am, Jones arrives at the office, opens his office, slips off his jacket, hangs it on the back of the chair, plugs his laptop in, starts his morning replication session, slopes off to the coffee machine for the first of many while it works away....

10.05am, Phone call, number witheld, unusual to start with, conversation goes like this...

Caller : good morning Mr Jones this is *insert name* from Natwest bank here, did you know there was a large withdrawl from your account yesterday,
Jones : Pardon me?
Caller: Yes, could you just confirm a few details for our records, mothers maiden name, house address etc.

At this point alarm bells start to ring, as far as I know, my bank dosn't know where I work, never told them so why would they call me here....

Jones:I tell you what, give me your number and I'll get back to you in a few minutes, just in the middle of something right now.
Caller: click brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr phone goes dead.

Panic sets in, reaches around to feel the inside of jacket pocket where the wallet was, hey guess what no wallet,and it was there when I set off from home. Fuck.Jones phones the real bank.

Bank: yes Mr Jones your card was used at 9.47 this morning to make a £200 cash withdrawl at tescos supermarket in *insert town name*, and was then atempted to be used at jacksons store at 9.59am and was refused by the cashier.

Bugger fuck, see whats happend here?, some wanker has walked into our office complex, and fleeced my wallet from my jacket, a wallet that contained nothing more than a couple of credit cards, a postage stamp, picture of my kid,business cards, condom (always prepared:D ) and about £5 in cash.

How did this guy get into the building?, I'll tell you shall I, some fool had wedged one of the security doors to the building open with a fire extinguisher, what amuses me is he took the wallet only, if he'd have felt in my other pocket he could have had my rio mp3 player, he failed to notice the brand new nokia cell phone on my desk, and also failed to notice the £3000 worth of IBM stinkpad on the desk as well, oh how I wish he'd taken that.

Oh and if thought he was safe with witholding his phone number from me, think again, I'm a voice systems enginner by trade, and let me tell you, you might think your number is witheld, but it's still visable on the network level :D, so naturally I have that information, and have handed it over to the police, fear us network guys, you can hide nothing..

So three boooooo's to the following.......

The fuckwit who propped the door open alowing this wanker into the building in the first place.
The dumb ass cashier who totaly failed to notice that the person they were handing over £200 worth of my cash to, didn't even remoltely look like the security photo on the credit card they were swiping, unless they are now selling Jones masks at the local halloween store, or I have an evil twin roaming the streets somewhere.

Three cheers for the ......
Cashier at the other store who refused my card on the second attempt
The guy at Cable and Wireless phone networks who rushed like a mad man to get me the call CILE records so I could find this wankers number.

And if it's any consolation, they also did the same thing to our financial director, cept they got the best part of a £1000 off his cards, he can afford it, I can't :D

Ok rant over, if your reading this Mr office thief, I hope you enjoy the £200 of my hard earned cash you stole off me, hope you choke on it, and if you use the condom in the wallet, I hope it splits on you.
And if thats your home phone number you called from, and there is no reason to belive it isn't cos it was listed as a domestic number rather than a call box, then expect the cops to be knocking anytime soon. Never knock over a network guy, we'll find you every time :)

Rant over..................

19th September 2001, 18:23
:( That really sucks, MJ

It's too bad that more people don't actually inquire before they give away personal information; In this case, asking saved your ass from being robbed even more :)

19th September 2001, 19:42
haha loser!!!

no you. the guy who stole from you....
back when my house was robbed, they had taken our laptop. well...they used it to connect to the internet (via my dialup service) so my dad called the ISP, tells them what happened...the ISP find where it connected from, and the next day...they got busted:)

19th September 2001, 23:05
Damn, that's gotta suck. Yeah it's sad that most places don't even bother to look at the photo on your ID, as long as it looks like an ID card they'll accept it. People just don't take and pride in their jobs, as low as they may be.

20th September 2001, 07:04
Geez, MJ. I hope the loser gets busted real soon. :)

/Me phears you network guys... :D

Oh, and Valkyre, would you mind cutting your sig size down a bit? That's a little over the top, if you know what I mean. Just a line or two with some links is fine, but not seven lines of shtuff... :)

20th September 2001, 14:25
Feels like being raped, huh?
My home was burglarized years ago. I got some of it back after he was caught burglarizing someone while the lowlife's wife was giving birth at the hospital. I've been promised reimbursement once he is released from prison though I'm sure that he'll have to steal from someone else to do that.
I hope they allow you to kneecap the bugger someday;)

20th September 2001, 18:07
Hrmm, my sig too big? Ok then, I'll cut it down.

Bilbo Baggins
20th September 2001, 21:05
I think your company shoudl sack the retard on the door, and maybe shove that fire extinguisher someplace else...

My cellphone got nicked at school just before Chrimbo, and i found out who had nicked it, and why.

It was the school druggie, paying for his fix!

John M
20th September 2001, 23:08
You stole your own cellphone? :p

21st September 2001, 09:08
Obivously, he did. :p

Bilbo Baggins
21st September 2001, 20:44
Who ever said bankmanagers were heartless?

How much of that money did your lawyer take though?