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I want to avoid online-banking
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If you have Visa cash cards you can avoid putting your bank account in the system. Here you can just buy one for a few hundred at the supermarket and refill it. That makes your exposure really low.
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although she doesn't understand, why she should do that
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You wouldn't like it either, and if you are in similar circumstances, you'd probably be acting up too.
Being a guy, I know it's a fools errand to argue with women. Not mom and not her nursing staff. Agree with both and try to make peace. If you do need to put your foot down with either, give them candy first.
They're women. If they don't have anything to bitch about, they'll make some bullshit up. 99% of the time, it is just personalities and bullshit. If you are supportive of both your mom and the overworked staff that has to tend her, you'll be on everybody's good side.
Candy and cookies are good. Some for the staff, some for your mom... It's hard to bitch when you're eating a cookie.