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Old 4th December 2013, 07:07   #15
Aminifu
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Chicago, IL
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Sounds like you're doing a hell of a lot of walking back. This is what I meant about choices. Sometimes they are hard. Why associate with people you don't approve of and try to deal with all the BS? Because they're family doesn't grant them a special license. If you get along with your brother and sister, you can see them without their mates being present. If not, you can love and wish them well from a distance. It's their life and you can't do anything about their choices.

You can't pick your relatives and you don't have to put up with their BS. If they don't like it and turn away from you, so what. What are you losing? What's important, your peace of mind or theirs? If that's being selfish, then I'm selfish.

People change. Sometimes for the better and sometimes not. You need to deal with them for who they are, not what they used to be or what they may become. Don't try to ignore or overlook what you truly can't. Walk away or run. If circumstances change you can always reconnect.

I've had to walk away from some family and former friends. It only hurt for a little while. I've been able to reconnect with a few. I found other people I liked being around (with their faults) and who liked being around me (with my faults). But it began with me. I had to put misery, bad times, and bad associations behind me. I had to be honest with myself. I had to accept my good and bad, my strengths and weaknesses. Some of my bad I've tried to work on and some of it I've owned. It's me, what the hell, I'm no saint, nobody is.

I deserve to enjoy the rest of my life, you deserve to enjoy yours. I sometimes think about what if, but I don't dwell on it. I have some guilt over some of my choices, but for the most part my conscience is clear. Thanksgiving is both the happiest and saddest holiday for me.

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