Chocolate is Better than Sex

Starbucks · 1st November 2003, 23:20

Top 23 reasons why chocolate is better than sex:

1. You can get chocolate.
2. Chocolate is still good even when it has gone soft.
3. You can have chocolate even in front of your mother.
4. With chocolate there's no need to fake it.
5. You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
6. You can have chocolate with family members.
7. You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to.
8. Good chocolate is easy to find.
9. You can safely have chocolate while driving.
10. With chocolate size doesn't matter; it's always good.
11. If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won't mind.
12. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names.
13. The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate.
14. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.
15. It's easy to find 9 inches of chocolate.
16. You can have chocolate on top of your desk at work without upsetting co-workers.
17. Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
18. You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
19. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle.
20. When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbours awake.
21. Chocolate can stay hard for a week, and satisfies even when it has gone soft.
22. "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
23. You don't have to wait until half-time to talk to your chocolate.
24. You won't find out later that your chocolate is married.

cyu · 1st November 2003, 23:32

lmao..I've seen those be4 but still very funny

Raz · 1st November 2003, 23:40

There are only so many shitty steriotypes in jokes i can take before i go on a killing spree.

ShyShy · 1st November 2003, 23:42

Actually the only time chocolate could even be remotely better than sex is when you combine the two!

GarbagePoe · 1st November 2003, 23:43

Lol the last one.

sidd · 1st November 2003, 23:51

like sex and warm melted oozing sticky choc... or maybe a big bathtub full of choc..

mmmmmmm...

ShyShy · 1st November 2003, 23:52

Nah, this is what I had in mind

ElChevelle · 2nd November 2003, 00:19

Reversal of thread:
Chocolate is worth a lick or two but girls are worth licking all night

Bob the Tomato · 2nd November 2003, 01:48

(Deep Breath)

CHOOOOOCOLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTE! - Spongebob Squarepants

richardharris · 2nd November 2003, 02:05

Chocolate dont talk... but cant f*ck!!

Widdykats · 2nd November 2003, 02:18

Quote:

Originally posted by ElChevelle
Reversal of thread:
Chocolate is worth a lick or two but girls are worth licking all night

The Legend
The Man
The Mod

ElChevelle · 2nd November 2003, 03:24

The Man
The Mod
The Myth

Or so legend would tell until the first screaming female emerges from the bunker screaming "Take me before I have to endure such pleasure again!"

horse-fly · 2nd November 2003, 03:50

Quote:

Or so legend would tell until the first screaming female emerges from the bunker screaming "Take me before I have to endure such pleasure again!"

bunker, ehh?

how romantic...

Coman · 2nd November 2003, 04:30

lol at the first one

White Raven · 2nd November 2003, 04:46

Heh, ShyShy, great minds do think alike.

ShyShy · 2nd November 2003, 05:06

Oh, there's more at that site Raven, ALL kinds of goodies

Mr_007 · 2nd November 2003, 14:10

Chocolate is best.

Widdykats · 2nd November 2003, 15:29

Quote:

Originally posted by Mr_007
Chocolate is best.

Not in This Household, !!!

Rellik · 2nd November 2003, 18:12

yeah, chocolate is bad for cats

DrKillPatient · 2nd November 2003, 19:41

Isn't she sexy?

Coman · 2nd November 2003, 19:48

hey, that's pr0nography.

ShyShy · 2nd November 2003, 19:51

Quote:

Originally posted by DrKillPatient

Isn't she sexy?

Hahahahaha....hehe

That was good!

White Raven · 2nd November 2003, 21:34

Actually, I think chocolate would be better, depending on who your partner is. If it's someone you don't love, then I'd say chocolate is better, but if it's someone you love and loves you back, then chocolate suddenly seems really, really small. ^_^

Shenlong · 2nd November 2003, 21:38

Really, really small? Yep...Just like my...

Peanut M&Ms...

iomegajaz · 2nd November 2003, 21:40

Quote:

Originally posted by DrKillPatient

Isn't she sexy?

Mmm. Green.

cyu · 2nd November 2003, 22:01

I'd hit it.

Widdykats · 2nd November 2003, 22:02

mmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooohhhhhhhahhhhhhhh sex!
just read cyu post. ahahahahahahahahahah ahhhhhhh*whew*

1st November 2003, 23:20	#1
Starbucks Forum King Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Forums Posts: 2,685	Chocolate is Better than Sex Top 23 reasons why chocolate is better than sex: 1. You can get chocolate. 2. Chocolate is still good even when it has gone soft. 3. You can have chocolate even in front of your mother. 4. With chocolate there's no need to fake it. 5. You are never too young or too old for chocolate. 6. You can have chocolate with family members. 7. You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to. 8. Good chocolate is easy to find. 9. You can safely have chocolate while driving. 10. With chocolate size doesn't matter; it's always good. 11. If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won't mind. 12. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names. 13. The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate. 14. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped. 15. It's easy to find 9 inches of chocolate. 16. You can have chocolate on top of your desk at work without upsetting co-workers. 17. Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant. 18. You can have chocolate at any time of the month. 19. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle. 20. When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbours awake. 21. Chocolate can stay hard for a week, and satisfies even when it has gone soft. 22. "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate. 23. You don't have to wait until half-time to talk to your chocolate. 24. You won't find out later that your chocolate is married.

1st November 2003, 23:43	#5
GarbagePoe Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: \|\|\|\| \|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\| \|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\| \|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\| Posts: 459	Lol the last one. i close my eyes to stay blind

2nd November 2003, 04:30	#14
Coman Punk (Forum King) Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: 4.5th dimension . . Posts: infinitely few Posts: 2,799	lol at the first one "Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?"

2nd November 2003, 04:46	#15
White Raven Little Winged One Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Canada, now UK Posts: 4,174	Heh, ShyShy, great minds do think alike. just as feathery as ever \| portfolio \| a poignant quote

2nd November 2003, 19:48	#21
Coman Punk (Forum King) Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: 4.5th dimension . . Posts: infinitely few Posts: 2,799	hey, that's pr0nography. "Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?"

1st November 2003, 23:32	#2
cyu Major Dude Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: in front of my pc Posts: 1,617	lmao..I've seen those be4 but still very funny

1st November 2003, 23:40	#3
Raz Forum King Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Manchester Posts: 6,470	There are only so many shitty steriotypes in jokes i can take before i go on a killing spree.

1st November 2003, 23:42	#4
ShyShy Amazon Bush Woman Forum Queen Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Sticks, Queensland Posts: 8,066	Actually the only time chocolate could even be remotely better than sex is when you combine the two!

1st November 2003, 23:51	#6
sidd Major Dude Join Date: May 2003 Location: Australia Posts: 1,353	like sex and warm melted oozing sticky choc... or maybe a big bathtub full of choc.. mmmmmmm...

1st November 2003, 23:52	#7
ShyShy Amazon Bush Woman Forum Queen Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Sticks, Queensland Posts: 8,066	Nah, this is what I had in mind

2nd November 2003, 00:19	#8
ElChevelle Moderator Alumni Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: the MANCANNON! Posts: 22,448	Reversal of thread: Chocolate is worth a lick or two but girls are worth licking all night

2nd November 2003, 01:48	#9
Bob the Tomato Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: Louisiana Posts: 258	(Deep Breath) CHOOOOOCOLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTE! - Spongebob Squarepants

2nd November 2003, 02:05	#10
richardharris Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 132	Chocolate dont talk... but cant f*ck!!

2nd November 2003, 03:24	#12
ElChevelle Moderator Alumni Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: the MANCANNON! Posts: 22,448	The Man The Mod The Myth Or so legend would tell until the first screaming female emerges from the bunker screaming "Take me before I have to endure such pleasure again!"

2nd November 2003, 05:06	#16
ShyShy Amazon Bush Woman Forum Queen Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Sticks, Queensland Posts: 8,066	Oh, there's more at that site Raven, ALL kinds of goodies

2nd November 2003, 14:10	#17
Mr_007 Banned Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 2,838	Chocolate is best.

2nd November 2003, 18:12	#19
Rellik Major Dude Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: localhost Posts: 1,099	yeah, chocolate is bad for cats

2nd November 2003, 19:41	#20
DrKillPatient Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 84	Isn't she sexy?

2nd November 2003, 21:34	#23
White Raven Little Winged One Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Canada, now UK Posts: 4,174	Actually, I think chocolate would be better, depending on who your partner is. If it's someone you don't love, then I'd say chocolate is better, but if it's someone you love and loves you back, then chocolate suddenly seems really, really small. ^_^ just as feathery as ever \| portfolio \| a poignant quote

2nd November 2003, 21:38	#24
Shenlong Forum King Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: About 38°N, 86°W Posts: 2,905	Really, really small? Yep...Just like my... Peanut M&Ms... A very close Japanese friend I knew a while ago once said to me "Watashi no koto wo oboeta, onegai shimasu...Yakusoku?" I forgot his name though...

2nd November 2003, 22:01	#26
cyu Major Dude Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: in front of my pc Posts: 1,617	I'd hit it.

2nd November 2003, 22:02	#27
Widdykats The Forum Slut Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: A place that invites a post pumping whore from NY Posts: 15,787	mmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooohhhhhhhahhhhhhhh sex! just read cyu post. ahahahahahahahahahah ahhhhhhhwhew Ooh, Gabardine

Thread Tools	Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Email this Page	Search this Thread: Advanced Search
Display Modes
Switch to Linear Mode Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode