Pillow Talk

[MStar]

A woman is in bed with her lover who happens to be her husband's best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they're just laying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation ...

(She is speaking in a cheery voice) "Hello? Oh, hi. I'm so glad that you called. Really? That's wonderful. I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye."

She hangs up the telephone, and her lover asks, "Who was that?"
"Oh," she replies," that was my husband telling me all about the
wonderful time he's having with you on his fishing trip."

---

A man escapes from a prison where he has been kept for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the husband out of bed and ties him to a chair.

While tying the wife to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While the man is in bathroom, the husband tells his wife..."Listen, this guy is an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He has probably spent lots of time in jail, and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist. Don't complain. Do what he tells you. Just give him satisfaction, no matter how much he ravages you. This guy is probably dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which the wife responds..."He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom. I told him where to find it. Be strong, honey. I love you, too."