Bailiff, Whack his pee-pee!

[ElChevelle]

Fekk, I've got jury duty tomorrow!

That poor bastard is getting a guilty verdict from me just for punishing me with his trial. It better at least be something cool with bloody pics and big knives, not some sissy "I dropped a cinder block on my dog" crap.
At least when I sat on OJ's jury, I could place strategic farts whenever Marcia Clark said the name "O.J."

Anyone have an interesting jury tale?

[s1138]

/me says "your not suppose to talk about the trial"


/me whispers "tell us everything"

/me coughs and then walks away

[missyob]

I have not been on a jury before, and I dont think I would make a good juror. I am a "feelings" person, and I think I would feel sorry for the person that may go to jail.


Have fun Chev, I know they pay you big bucks for being a juror. Isnt it like 20.00 a day? Hardly worth your time away from your family.

Big Hugs,

~ Missy

[distortion]

I have a jury story, it's a story of triumph. A story, of courage.

Around October of '99 (to serve in March, '00) I got my (first) dreaded jury duty notice. Nothing interesting as far as crimes happens around here, I figured I should either get out of it, or have to deal with a whole day of minimum wage for listening to cases about people who slippped and fell on their ass at McDonald's (and in turn, losing time @ work, and likely getting fired from that job ). Having had a back problem a couple years ago, it was on record with my Doctor's office. I had him write me a note saying I couldn't sit for a prolonged period of time, I presented it in the "medical excuse" room at the beginning, they read the note, stamped me and said have a nice day. (I = winnar!) Okay that wasn't too interesting, but I wangled my way out of it...

[edit] Yes, I know I use too damn many smilies.

[eleet-2k2]

Originally posted by distortion
I have a jury story, it's a story of triumph. A story, of courage.

Around October of '99 (to serve in March, '00) I got my (first) dreaded jury duty notice. Nothing interesting as far as crimes happens around here, I figured I should either get out of it, or have to deal with a whole day of minimum wage for listening to cases about people who slippped and fell on their ass at McDonald's (and in turn, losing time @ work, and likely getting fired from that job ). Having had a back problem a couple years ago, it was on record with my Doctor's office. I had him write me a note saying I couldn't sit for a prolonged period of time, I presented it in the "medical excuse" room at the beginning, they read the note, stamped me and said have a nice day. (I = winnar!) Okay that wasn't too interesting, but I wangled my way out of it...

[edit] Yes, I know I use too damn many smilies.

Nothin like the ol' doc's note.

Cya!

[John M]

just say you hate all people of color. that gets ya off the hook real quick-like. sure, you lose your chance with any women in the room, but with the time you told your company you were taking for jury duty you could go to a strip bar.

[sgtfuzzbubble011]

Dist-
There's no such thing as "too damn many smilies."

And another easy way to get out of jury duty is to say "Uh yeah. Like, I work for an attorney and shtuff."

[Curi0us_George]

Well, you could always just show up and start speaking another language. "No habla Inglés."

[pAk]

I had to do Jury Duty, boring as hell, fortunately it only lasted a couple of days.

The prosectutions case was basically, 'Find him guilty 'cause we say he is'

It was a complete waste of time and should have been kicked out well before getting round to wasting my time

[Huehuetenango]

my mom was going to be on the jury for the paul bernardo trial (anyone here remember that?) but got out of it b/c her cousin was one of the police who found the bodies in teh lake

[NukePeng]

I've never had jury duty and i dread it. I didnt know they paid you tho. I have myoclonus, and its recorded medicly. could i get out with that?

[eleet-2k2]

$20 sucks llama nut's to be paid for all the money you'd lose for working that day(s).

But I'm too young for it anyway so who cares!

[Bilbo Baggins]

The legal systems of the west are total and utter monkeywank.

[Huehuetenango]

yeah, basically
any other place where you can buy your freedom in a so-called fair judicial system?

[ElChevelle]

Just got home from day one.
It took 6 1/2 hours to seat a jury, for god's sake.
I can't discuss details but it's pretty major
Not murder but along the lines of a guy who's name rhymes with "Soddly Bing"
As soon as it's over, I'll share the juice, pepper spray and the phone numbers of 2 of the juror babes

BTW, 95% of jury trials occur in the United States.

[missyob]

Originally posted by ElChevelle
As soon as it's over, I'll share the juice, pepper spray and the phone numbers of 2 of the juror babes

Dont share the phone numbers of the babes hon, keep them for yourself!

I am glad to hear day 1 was good. Keep us updated.

~ Missy

[BullGawD]

sounds interesting Chev. My mom had to do jury duty about 5 years ago - a 2 hour drive from rural southern Oklahoma to Oklahoma City, every day for a month.

As for myself... was I supposed to return that little card they sent me when I turned 18 ?

[Huehuetenango]

good luck w/ the rest of your stint, man
are the seats comfortable

and try to get yourself "sequestered" w/ the jury-babes

[weedsatan]

Chev I hope the judge read this and cut you out cuz of your lack of abjectivity!!

[ElChevelle]

Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght
Whatever abjectivity is, I'm sure I'm not guilty of it

[weedsatan]

Originally posted by ElChevelle
Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght
Whatever abjectivity is, I'm sure I'm not guilty of it

Objectivity