Old 14th December 2002, 12:13   #1
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Does Santa Exist?

Does Santa Exist?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Scientists have tried to answer the question, "Does Santa come with flying reindeer to deliver presents at Christmas?" This is what they have found:

No known species of reindeer can fly, but there are 300,000 species of living organims yet to be classified. Although most of these are insects and bacteria, this does not rule out flying reindeer.
According to the Population Refeence Bureau, 378 million people celebrate Christmas worldwide. With an average of 3.5 children per home, that's 91.8 million homes for Santa to visit.
Thanks to different time zones, Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second. That means for each celebrating household with at least one good child in it, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, place presents under the tree, eat the cookies and return to the sleigh.
Assuming that all 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed throughout the earth, the total trip time will be 75.5 million miles. That means Santa's sleigh must move at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth (the Ulysses space probe) moves at 27.4 miles per second.
Assuming that each child get nothing more than a medium-sized Lego set (weighing 2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying a payload of 321,300 tons, not counting jolly ol' Saint Nick himself.
A standard reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even if flying reindeer might pull 10 times more than a normal reindeer, Santa would need 214,200 reindeer to pull the sleigh. The reindeer, payload, Santa and sleigh would therefore weigh more than 353,430 tons. This is four times the weight of the Q.E. II cruise ship.
This 353,430 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates tremendous air resistance, heating the reindeer in the same manner as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would therefore absorb 14.3 quintillion joule of energy, per second, each.
The lead reindeer, as a result will burst into flames, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating massive sonic booms in their wakes. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 0.00426 seconds. Santa will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500 times greater than gravity. Assuming that Santa weighs 250 pounds, he would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,375,000 pounds of centrifugal force.
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:16   #2
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Yes.
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:18   #3
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:18   #4
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Bilbo, just beacuse you dress up in a big red suit and give "Presents" to children dosent count!

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:23   #5
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...and by the way, the sheriff court up here wants a word with you about that...

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:31   #6
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the fastest man-made vehicle on earth (the Ulysses space probe)
Who can spot the problem in the above statement?
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:32   #7
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Who can spot the problem in the above statement?
ROFL!

that's brilliant!

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:34   #8
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LOL!

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:40   #9
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:48   #10
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Old 14th December 2002, 12:50   #11
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*fills Jedi Gemstone with cement and throws her into the firth of forth*

edit:apologies for gender confusion

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:52   #12
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Zootm, hes a she.

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:54   #13
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consider it edited

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Old 14th December 2002, 12:55   #14
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According to Anya on Buffy the vampire slayer,

santa did exist a few hundred years ago but he disembowelled children rather than giving presents

fun fun fun
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Old 14th December 2002, 13:11   #15
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Originally posted by zootm
*fills Jedi Gemstone with cement and throws her into the firth of forth*

edit:apologies for gender confusion
Evil Person Dishonour to the Jedi that is

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Old 14th December 2002, 13:15   #16
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ARGHHHH! ANDREW! BUFFY !=REAL!


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Old 14th December 2002, 13:56   #17
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Jedi! How could you? My poor nephmew!

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Old 14th December 2002, 18:54   #18
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Jedi Santa?
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Old 14th December 2002, 20:12   #19
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It's a shame that you went through all that trouble to type/cut-n-paste that info, since one word disproves your theory --> magic. j/k

Honestly though, have you not seen Santa Claus 2? Santa is magic, so therefore he can bend yout rules of physics and time and can make all his deliveries.

Acutally, noticing on a typo of 'Santa", "Satan" could be Santa's real name. How do we know? He likes the colour red awfully much, symbolic of blood and the devil. Satan also probably posses white flames, hence the white colour, although he could just be fond of the white stuff on the ground (). As for dealing with little children giving them presents: Satan entices people, escpecially the innocent dumb children, to commit evil deeds, or sell their souls, in return for materialistic things.

Thus: Santa = Satan



I do believe in St. Nick (or whatever his name was, I heard about it ages ago...) (the supposed real Santa) but I know that Santa is just a character created by corporations designed to sell gifts and capitalize around Christmas, distorting the true menaing of Christmas in order to make tons o' money.

"Welcome to the Island of people who know too much."..."Did you really think balloons would stop him?!"
See what I'm listening too.
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Old 14th December 2002, 20:16   #20
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uh, shut up and stuff
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Old 14th December 2002, 20:29   #21
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Santa's not a devil, he's a saint. Come on, Saint Nicholas?!

A very close Japanese friend I knew a while ago once said to me "Watashi no koto wo oboeta, onegai shimasu...Yakusoku?"

I forgot his name though...
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Old 14th December 2002, 20:32   #22
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Oh come on, it was a joke! Jeez...

"Welcome to the Island of people who know too much."..."Did you really think balloons would stop him?!"
See what I'm listening too.
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Old 14th December 2002, 21:05   #23
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yay for good ole Saint Nick.


















[SIZE=1/4]....hopefully I'll not get a piece of coal now...[/SIZE]
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Old 14th December 2002, 21:10   #24
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I molested sana
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Old 14th December 2002, 21:11   #25
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Quote:
Originally posted by Widdykats
Jedi! How could you? My poor nephmew!
What?!I didn't do anything to your cat what are you on about and I thought I told you before I hate the colour pink or do you not understand english shall I say it in french?
Je deteste le rose
or shall I put it down in italian too?
Odio il colore rosa
and if you dont understand that here it is in german
Ich hasse Pink
I'm only joking around

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Old 14th December 2002, 21:18   #26
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"Oh, come on Lisa, everyone knows that leprechauns died out years ago!"

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Old 14th December 2002, 21:21   #27
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Originally posted by I am Jesus
I molested sana
gasp...for a minute I was thinking of someone else...heh...
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Old 14th December 2002, 21:29   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by 31337-2k2

I do believe in St. Nick (or whatever his name was, I heard about it ages ago...) (the supposed real Santa) but I know that Santa is just a character created by corporations designed to sell gifts and capitalize around Christmas, distorting the true menaing of Christmas in order to make tons o' money.
Wasn't the whole point of CHRISTmas, to celebrate his christs birth?

Somewhere in time it got confused.

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Old 14th December 2002, 21:39   #29
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That is the (supposed) significance of the date, but it is not the meaning of the holiday.

The red-and-white fat man with the big bushy white beard is a creation of Coca-Cola. Still in use today in their Christmas-time ad campaign.

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Old 14th December 2002, 21:46   #30
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Quote:
Originally posted by hestermofet
That is the (supposed) significance of the date, but it is not the meaning of the holiday.

The red-and-white fat man with the big bushy white beard is a creation of Coca-Cola. Still in use today in their Christmas-time ad campaign.
Gasp!, I had no idea, imagine if they copyrighted Santa Claus

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Old 14th December 2002, 22:11   #31
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Gemstone
[B]

What?!I didn't do anything to your cat what are you on about and I thought I told you before I hate the colour pink or do you not understand english shall I say it in french?
Je deteste le rose
or shall I put it down in italian too?
Odio il colore rosa
and if you dont understand that here it is in german
Ich hasse Pink
I'm only joking around [
/B]
Jedi sorry about the color
honest, all children of all ages want to believe in Santa.
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Old 14th December 2002, 22:16   #32
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The piece, "Yes, Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus," is a classic. It was written in 1897 by Francis P. Church, the editor of the now-defunct New York Sun. He wrote it in response to this letter:

"Dear Editor: I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, 'If you see it in the Sun, it's so.' Please tell me the truth. Is there a Santa Claus?" -- Virginia O'Hanlon

"Dear Virginia: Your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except what they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little.

"In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

"Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! How dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias.

"There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

"Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus.

"The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in this world.

"You tear apart the baby's rattle to see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart.

"Only faith, poetry, love, romance can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

"No Santa Claus? Thank God he lives, and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood."

The sentimental answer


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Old 15th December 2002, 01:00   #33
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"Lots of things are invisible, but we don't know how many because we can't see them."
-Dennis the Menace

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Old 15th December 2002, 02:06   #34
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Quote:
: "Have you ever seen a million dollars?"
: "No."
: "Just because you haven't seen something, doesn't mean it doesn't exist."
-Charlie, The Santa Clause

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Old 15th December 2002, 12:29   #35
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I know a kid that still believes in Santa... He's 16 years old... you would think the secret would have slipped by now.

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Old 15th December 2002, 13:38   #36
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Re: Does Santa Exist?

Quote:
Originally posted by j0ck3
Does Santa Exist?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Scientists have tried to answer the question, "Does Santa come with flying reindeer to deliver presents at Christmas?" This is what they have found:

No known species of reindeer can fly, but there are 300,000 species of living organims yet to be classified. Although most of these are insects and bacteria, this does not rule out flying reindeer.
According to the Population Refeence Bureau, 378 million people celebrate Christmas worldwide. With an average of 3.5 children per home, that's 91.8 million homes for Santa to visit.
Thanks to different time zones, Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second. That means for each celebrating household with at least one good child in it, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, place presents under the tree, eat the cookies and return to the sleigh.
Assuming that all 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed throughout the earth, the total trip time will be 75.5 million miles. That means Santa's sleigh must move at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth (the Ulysses space probe) moves at 27.4 miles per second.
Assuming that each child get nothing more than a medium-sized Lego set (weighing 2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying a payload of 321,300 tons, not counting jolly ol' Saint Nick himself.
A standard reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even if flying reindeer might pull 10 times more than a normal reindeer, Santa would need 214,200 reindeer to pull the sleigh. The reindeer, payload, Santa and sleigh would therefore weigh more than 353,430 tons. This is four times the weight of the Q.E. II cruise ship.
This 353,430 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates tremendous air resistance, heating the reindeer in the same manner as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would therefore absorb 14.3 quintillion joule of energy, per second, each.
The lead reindeer, as a result will burst into flames, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating massive sonic booms in their wakes. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 0.00426 seconds. Santa will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500 times greater than gravity. Assuming that Santa weighs 250 pounds, he would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,375,000 pounds of centrifugal force.
ROFLMAO...
damn jock u need a life
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Old 15th December 2002, 16:02   #37
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Quote:
Originally posted by hestermofet
The red-and-white fat man with the big bushy white beard is a creation of Coca-Cola. Still in use today in their Christmas-time ad campaign.
I'm afraid you are wrong, here. Santa Claus has a much longer history than that, and he existed in his present form for some time before Coca-Cola came along. Coca-Cola just sort of cemented him into the American mind.

Quote:
A long excerpt from http://www.northpolesantaclaus.com/santahistory.htm
In the 1600's, the Dutch presented Sinterklaas (meaning St. Nicholas) to the colonies. In their excitement, many English-speaking children uttered the name so quickly that Sinterklaas sounded like Santy Claus. After years of mispronunciation, the name evolved into Santa Claus.

In 1808, American author Washington Irving created a new version of old St. Nick. This one rode over the treetops in a horse drawn wagon "dropping gifts down the chimneys of his favorites." In his satire, Diedrich Knickerbocker's History of New York from the Beginning of the World to the End of the Dutch Dynasty, Irving described Santa as a jolly Dutchman who smoked a long stemmed clay pipe and wore baggy breeches and a broad brimmed hat. Also, the familiar phrase, "...laying his finger beside his nose...," first appeared in Irving's story.

That phrase was used again in 1822 in the now-classic poem by Dr. Clement Clarke Moore, "A Visit from St. Nicholas," more commonly know as "The Night Before Christmas." His verse gave an Arctic flavor to Santa's image when he substituted eight tiny reindeer and a sleigh for Irving's horse and wagon. It is Moore's description of Santa that we most often think of today: "He had a broad face, and a little round belly, that shook, when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly."

Up to this point, Santa's physical appearance and the color of his suit were open to individual interpretation. Then in 1863, Thomas Nast, a German immigrant, gave us a visual image of the cheerful giver that was to later become widely accepted.

When Nast was asked to illustrate Moore's charming verse for a book of children's poems, he gave us a softer, kinder Santa who was still old but appeared less stern than the ecclesiastical St. Nicholas. He dressed his elfin figure in red and endowed him with human characteristics. Most important of all, Nast gave Santa a home at the North Pole. For twenty-three years, his annual drawings in Harpers Weekly magazine allowed Americans to peek into the magical world of Santa Claus and set the stage for the shaping of today's merry gentleman.

Artist Haddon Sundblom added the final touches to Santa's modern image. Beginning in 1931, his billboard and other advertisements for Coca Cola-Cola featured a portly, grandfatherly Santa with human proportions and a ruddy complexion. Sunblom's exuberant, twinkle-eyed Santa firmly fixed the gift-giver's image in the public mind.

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Old 15th December 2002, 18:12   #38
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i'm not quite sure about the authenticity of all of that. i do know there was a santa that was green before there was a red one.

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Old 15th December 2002, 18:17   #39
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I found equivalent info from a number of other sources. I'm pretty sure that it is fairly accurate.

P.S. Santa has gone through a ton of "revisions". I don't doubt that he once wore green. In his more elven years, it's quite likely.

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Old 15th December 2002, 18:20   #40
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fair enough. it was the lack of info on the green one i was worried about, rather than the wealth of info on the red one

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