Old 28th November 2006, 21:13   #1
GeminiJ
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Confusion about what I should do

ok, so this may not be the place for this, but I need help.
Let me tell the story.

I am a senior in high school and about a month ago I threw a party at my house. All my friends came, got pretty messed up, but there was this girl named Alyssa that got wasted and starting throwing up. I as the one that took care of her that night, and her boyfriend was also at my house, but he didn't seem so concerned about her.

I was concerned though, and that next day she text me saying how sorry she was for drinking to much and causing a mess. We started talking alot, and now every day we talk. Thing is, there are alot of problems with her boyfriend and her.

They fight alot, he has hit her in the past and they end up breaking up, but they still act like they are going out. I am friends with her and her bf, but she has some deep feelings for me, and I for her.

yesterday while we were all getting high, I turn around for a second and they are kissing. She is always telling me how much she wants me, but I feel like I'm just being played with.

I want to be with her too, we have grown attached to each other and I don't know what to do. my friends say to stay away from her, but others have told me to hang in there.

She is very confused about what she wants and she is hurting me in the process, I just don't know what I should do.

Advice is very much appreciated
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Old 28th November 2006, 21:38   #2
Enigma66
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How old are you, 14? This sounds like a storyline from some lame TV show that only lasts 3 episodes before it gets canned.

She isn't hurting you, you're letting yourself get hurt... over someone who isn't worth it to begin with.

She's a friend at most, leave it at that.
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Old 28th November 2006, 21:44   #3
fc*uk
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Re: Confusion about what I should do

Sorry bro ... you answered your own question:

Quote:
Originally posted by GeminiJ
She is very confused about what she wants and she is hurting me in the process, I just don't know what I should do.

Advice is very much appreciated
Confused woman = stay the hell away. Like you said, you'll get hurt.
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Old 28th November 2006, 21:57   #4
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Gee is dat sum copypasta?
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Old 28th November 2006, 21:58   #5
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puberty sucks!
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:06   #6
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Confused women are quite dangerous; buy some handcuffs and you're set.

present day present time
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:07   #7
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BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Yah what?

And how dare someone else be from minneapolis... get the fuck out of my city.
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:11   #8
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dating 101, chapter 1, be the man.

Stop being a wussy, be the man and talk to her about it. just don't be a jealous idiot about it, because this will make her loose interest in you.

obviously your acting girly, and she can smell it a mile away, hence her actions.

you could also just ask her out, and just not worry about the other guy pretend he doesn't exist. If she says yes then your in the ballpark. Deal with the other boyfriend later or get a second girlfriend, this will make her feel jealous.

i don't know why, but girls are attracted to guys that treat them like they're nothing, yeah they complain about it and all, but what they're really after in a man is a man and not a wussy. i know a lot of guys that i think treat their ladys badly, but the girls never seem to leave. its always the guys that leave with another girl.

she will get rid of the other guy if she finds you much more attractive and fun than he is. Why wouldn't she?

so get your ass into gear, and go now to be the man.
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:22   #9
Too-DAMN-Much
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if he's beating her, you need to take a bat to his dome.

I hate everyone, so you don't have to.
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:25   #10
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*sigh*
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:26   #11
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i never said they do...

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Old 28th November 2006, 22:27   #12
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LOL
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:29   #13
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umm... ok, now i remember why i ignored you in the first place...

dumbass little kids... *mutter* *mutter*

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Old 28th November 2006, 22:31   #14
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Take heed, your signature.
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:33   #15
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2 wrong things always make a right.
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Old 28th November 2006, 22:45   #16
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Quote:
Originally posted by skryingbreath
Take heed, your signature.
rofls
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Old 28th November 2006, 23:02   #17
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Take heed, your signature.
Well played, sir.

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Old 28th November 2006, 23:11   #18
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I agree!

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Old 28th November 2006, 23:19   #19
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You can't help her alone. No, you can't: you'd be helping her for your own good instead of honestly helping her out.
If you care about her, get others involved, forget about love right now and treat her as a friend, if you can do that. If you can't, stay away from her. You'd be ruining both your lives. She's not ready for a relationship right now.

If she's smart, she'd really break up and stay away from him for obvious reasons.
So, yes, she's afraid of him - That'd be even more of a big red blinking signal that says nothing but 'stay away from this asshole. You're worth a lot more than this.'

Convince her to go into therapy. Abused, physically, sexually and/or verbally, people will fall in love with abusive people.
That's all they know - they also somehow feel comfortable in such a situation even if that means they're being abused.
She needs to learn to break that cycle.

And don't deny that the drugs are involved in this. The fact that you mentioned it to begin with here proves it.
Drugs are bad, mmkmay?

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Old 29th November 2006, 04:06   #20
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My two cents, I disagree with Rocker... what the fuck, dont change your lifestyle into treating girls like shit, just to get a girl. Thats retarded. I am gonna agree with Warrior of the Light, abusive relationships are pretty bad. I am also gonna agree with Too Damn Much, beating of his ass needs to be done.
I am in a somewhat similar situation, except not at all. and its a long distance relationship that I have. I really want to beat the guy's ass for overstepping his boundaries and harassing her, but I am half way across the country, due to military.
ignoring the fact some of you might be in disagreement of violence, is it wrong to get a local guy to do the beating. My thoughts on it are: the harasser wouldnt understand why he was getting the beat down, it would be like punishing a dog a day later. ?
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Old 29th November 2006, 04:47   #21
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rocker
2 wrong things always make a right.
I thought it was 3 lefts make a right.
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Old 29th November 2006, 05:23   #22
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She's nuts. You're probably only a little nuts. You might be good for each other despite that, but only after she realizes that she's going to be attracted to other idiots who are going to abuse her, and not as attracted to you (at least for a while), for the same reason. It's irrational, but she's not going to be *very* attracted to the guy she really wants, which is potencially you.

Don't be abusive, but don't be a whiny bitch about anything. Help her get out of the abusive relationship, and treat her like a friend afterwards. If she's really interested in you, she'll come to you. Otherwise, you're going to get burned. In fact, you're still probably going to get burned with her.

If you get into a relationship with her, make sure EVERYTHING is on the table. Talk EVERYTHING through, to death. You'll be screwed otherwise.

Freedom of speech is the basic freedom of humanity. When you've lost that, you've lost everything.
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Old 29th November 2006, 05:24   #23
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Re: Re: Confusion about what I should do

Quote:
Originally posted by fc*uk
Confused woman = stay the hell away.
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Old 29th November 2006, 06:09   #24
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Why does everyone keep giving serious answers?
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Old 29th November 2006, 06:21   #25
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Quote:
Originally posted by S-uper_T-oast
Why does everyone keep giving serious answers?
Quote:
Originally posted by m0e
I thought it was 3 lefts make a right.
That was a serious answer?
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Old 29th November 2006, 06:55   #26
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Nope. But a large portion of these are.
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Old 29th November 2006, 07:50   #27
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S_T this is not the RB

Jesus loves you [yes, you] so much, he even died for you so that you will not need to die, but live forever
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Old 29th November 2006, 11:20   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by sirebob
My two cents, I disagree with Rocker... what the fuck, dont change your lifestyle into treating girls like shit, just to get a girl. Thats retarded.
you don't treat them like shit, i think thats bad. but if you act like a girl or if your too predictive then its boring for them. i mean why would a girl want to go out with a girly guy?(unless its some sort of fetish). if your constantly going out with other girls(nothing serious) then she'll fight for the attention if she likes you enough.

some guys need to change their attitude or this will ALWAYS happen to them, girls will always get bored of them and leave.

I'm speaking from experience. I can still see where I fail.

I don't particularly care if you like my theory's or not, but girls will always have a better time with unpredictable funny guys with balls to talk about situations, rather than boring predictable wusses with no balls who'll just take it.

serious relationships are overrated, been there done that. turned out bad.
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Old 29th November 2006, 12:02   #29
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Re: Re: Confusion about what I should do

Quote:
Originally posted by fc*uk
Sorry bro ... you answered your own question:



Confused woman = stay the hell away. Like you said, you'll get hurt.
seconded

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Old 29th November 2006, 15:21   #30
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Quote:
Originally posted by Warrior of the Light
S_T this is not the RB
But it's still the interbuts!
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