Old 29th November 2005, 16:13   #1
ertmann|CPH
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chubby girls

ok.... had a hell of a fucked up weekend, and i feel like ranting. Don't get down with ladies heavier than though.

Was out driking with a couple of guys and gals from work, we ended up drinking a terrible amount of beers and shots without having anything to eat.

anyway around midnight this coworker attacks me, she's really really nice and sweet personality wise, but rather on the heavy side, allthough she wears the extra kilos quite well, and since im drunk, and not gay, we end up at her place.

I weigh in at a mere 67 kilos, and i believe her to be around 75'ish, and you know, i might be chauvistic and all, but sex is crap when the person wearing penetration device, can't control the action. and besides it's not particually pleasant to have a 75 kilo girl on top.

From now on ill stick to girls atleast 5 kilos lighter than me, only problem being that I actually like the girl, and she actually looks quite attractive when she's dressed. I think she wants more, even though we've both been playing it cool

when will i ever learn not to get involved with girls I have too see again
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Old 29th November 2005, 17:01   #2
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I wonder how she feels about humping a scrawny ass guy like yourself who likes to , by your own admission, 'control the action'

I also wonder what she'd have to say about you sharing your dissapointment online for the whole world to laugh at.
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Old 29th November 2005, 18:55   #3
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I like girls with a bit of weight on them. Not a lot but a bit. Gives them curves, plus they generally have better boobs.

.: fwgx.co.uk.:.My art:.

"We think science is interesting and if you disagree, you can fuck off."
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Old 29th November 2005, 18:57   #4
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tf


Who is the milkman? What is the purpose of the goggles?
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Old 29th November 2005, 19:02   #5
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It is my experience that the bigger girls will always be the nymphos in "girl world", maybe it is because they rarely have boyfriends to get them laid, or because they never get the best sex. I know one of my exgirlfriends, who was a little overweight, was a massive nympho, and there was one weekend where we never left the bed. But I had to break up with her cause she cheated on me ... go figure.

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Yeah, that's pretty much it. :-\
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Old 29th November 2005, 19:56   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by DuaneJeffers
I know one of my exgirlfriends, who was a little overweight, was a massive nympho, and there was one weekend where we never left the bed. But I had to break up with her cause she cheated on me ... go figure.


That's a CLASSIC Jerry Springer case. lol!
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Old 29th November 2005, 20:09   #7
rockouthippie
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Skinny girls are usually lousy in bed.
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Old 29th November 2005, 20:14   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by rockouthippie
Skinny girls are usually lousy in bed.
Agreed.

Girls with some meat on them are usually nymphs as well >..>
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Old 29th November 2005, 20:57   #9
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What is it about girls that weight around a couple vollyballs that make them the best sex partners?

"I just want to lie in my own crusty filth, eating rancid egg sandwiches, until some unfortunate paramedic has to blow down my door to find my bloated and pasty corpse wedged between the nightstand and mattress stained with Bengay and Robitussin DM." - Greg Gutfeld on sex and seniors
"Syphilis does not stay in Vegas. Debt collectors do not stay in Vegas. Dead hookers stay in Vegas, but the guilt stays with you forever." - Bill Schultz
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Old 29th November 2005, 23:21   #10
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AT least some of you are getting sex.
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Old 30th November 2005, 01:07   #11
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Your hand giving you the silent treatment?
Buy it a ring or something!
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Old 30th November 2005, 01:17   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bilbo Baggins
AT least some of you are getting sex.
ditto

Software is like sex: It's better when it's free.-*-If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0-*-Guess the band from pics game
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Old 30th November 2005, 01:50   #13
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Sex?
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Old 30th November 2005, 02:06   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by sgtfuzzbubble99
Sex?


Who is the milkman? What is the purpose of the goggles?
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Old 30th November 2005, 02:19   #15
rohan_pwln
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bilbo Baggins
AT least some of you are getting sex.
IT MIGHT BE THAT YOUR DICK'S,
THE BEST IN THE LAND,
BUT YOU SEEM UNLUCKY,
SO DO IT BY HAND!

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Old 30th November 2005, 02:38   #16
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Software is like sex: It's better when it's free.-*-If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0-*-Guess the band from pics game
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Old 30th November 2005, 02:38   #17
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... never again rohan

SEX APPEAL UP IN HERE!
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
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Old 30th November 2005, 03:20   #18
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never again what?

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Old 30th November 2005, 03:31   #19
rohan_pwln
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Just look at this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masturbate

:lmao: :lmao: ) ).

Some classics there:

A female masturbating

A male masturbating

Samurai being masturbated by his kagema boyfriend

Mark Twain said, "If you must gamble your lives sexually, don't play a lone hand too much".

"Masturbation can also be particularly useful in relationships where one partner wants more sex than the other—in which case masturbation provides a balancing effect and thus a more harmonious relationship."

"The word masturbation is believed by many to derive from the Greek word mezea (μεζεα, "penises") and the Latin turbare ("to disturb")..."

Do check it out.

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Old 30th November 2005, 03:32   #20
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Uhmm...Wow.
I did not know that kind of stuff was on a wiki >.>
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Old 30th November 2005, 03:58   #21
Too-DAMN-Much
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Quote:
Originally posted by rockouthippie
Skinny girls are usually lousy in bed.
how can you be bad at sitting there on your hands and knees?

I hate everyone, so you don't have to.
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Old 30th November 2005, 04:03   #22
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Oh believe me it is possible.
Anyway, at least ertmann got a good view of the ceiling.

I am so important I feel the need to let it be known like a liberal discovering the internets for the first time. Uh hur hur hur. I also wash myself with a rag on a stick.
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Old 30th November 2005, 05:05   #23
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bilbo Baggins
AT least some of you are getting sex.
Ditto. However, I will agree that girls with a little more cushion for the pushin' are very fun.

Spiral out, my friend. You will find your way back to yourself, we all will.
I'll be waiting, and shall see you on the other side...
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Old 30th November 2005, 06:11   #24
ertmann|CPH
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mr Jones
I wonder how she feels about humping a scrawny ass guy like yourself who likes to , by your own admission, 'control the action'

I also wonder what she'd have to say about you sharing your dissapointment online for the whole world to laugh at.
Well nothing in here to identify her, and as I said, I actually like the girl, so it's as much frustration with myself as with her.

I don't feel bad, but maybe i should, i don't know...
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Old 30th November 2005, 06:15   #25
rohan_pwln
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Let's analyse your problem:

1.You like the girl
2.You are feeling bad because you don't like her
3.You don't want to like her
4.You are not feeling bad.
5.You are feeling bad becuase you are not feeling bad about liking here but not wanting to like her

ot something like it. Now you give the solution.

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Old 30th November 2005, 06:25   #26
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Don't fuck around.


elevatorladyelevatorladyelevatorladyelevatorladyelevatorladylevitateme
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Old 30th November 2005, 06:28   #27
ertmann|CPH
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Quote:
Originally posted by rohan_pwln
Let's analyse your problem:



ot something like it. Now you give the solution.
lol

allthough it's more like this;

1.You like the girl (as a person)
2.You are feeling bad because you don't like her (physically)
3.You don't want to like her (sorta do actually, hence the problem)
4.You are not feeling bad. (for airing my frustration here, certainly better than among people who know both of us)
5.You are feeling bad becuase you are not feeling bad about liking here but not wanting to like her (erm?)

i'll think of a solution
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Old 30th November 2005, 07:01   #28
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How about porking her again for good measure? It might help you decide faster.

I am so important I feel the need to let it be known like a liberal discovering the internets for the first time. Uh hur hur hur. I also wash myself with a rag on a stick.
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Old 30th November 2005, 07:05   #29
rohan_pwln
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Quote:
5.You are feeling bad becuase you are not feeling bad about liking here but not wanting to like her (erm?)
Well, the 5th was a summary of it all.

P.S: Tell her to go to a gym, do some diet and all that. Then fuck here again and again and again. Sex is a good excercise.

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Old 30th November 2005, 09:19   #30
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Blimey, some of you really are a bunch of halfwits.
I think you'll find it's confidence in a girl not her weight. With attitudes like some floating around in this thread I expect you've annoyed a few poor lasses (including myself).
I'm not a chubby girl, I'm a very very skinny girl (through no fault of my own), I'd do anything to put a few pounds on. I don't believe that my weight reflects on my bedroom gymnastics though. I'm more bothered that I look stupid in short skirts.
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Old 30th November 2005, 09:40   #31
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Quote:
Originally posted by Evil Lu
Blimey, some of you really are a bunch of halfwits.
I wouldn't worry too much about it. I have a feeling that this is more of an announcement to the world that "LOL, I had the sex0r", rather than a legitimate complaint.

Though, chances are, she's probably posting on another forum right now something along the lines of "Girls, what do you think of sleeping with a weedy fuck who can't even control the action??"

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Old 30th November 2005, 09:44   #32
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Pffffffffft. Yes, you're probably right. I forget that I'm old and that it's a normal activity rather than something to go posting all over forums.
Mind you, does seem a few need educating in how to be pleasant to and about girls so they might get another sex0r one day rather than abusing themselves with pr0n-ladieez for the rest of their lives.
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Old 30th November 2005, 10:41   #33
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So ertmann-

I guess I'd call up Bill Clinton and ask him what to do when you get caught with the office fat chick

Errr... well I guess that didn't work out so good.

Go to work. Do some situps in case.... Damn the torpedos...
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Old 30th November 2005, 13:16   #34
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Quote:
Originally posted by skryingbreath
Uhmm...Wow.
I did not know that kind of stuff was on a wiki >.>
ditto, thats....wow
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Old 30th November 2005, 13:47   #35
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Skinny girls huh?
"They call me the ribcracker for I like to play the xylophone from the inside out."
-anonymously quoted
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Old 3rd December 2005, 09:04   #36
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Fat girls are clingy.
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Old 3rd December 2005, 16:42   #37
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dude!

the weigth shouldnt matter

if you like her like you say you do then that is all that should matter man!

go out on another date with her!

spend time with her and see if you like her.. and dont do MAD SEXXOR on the first date.. you can catch things that way!
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Old 4th December 2005, 04:08   #38
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I put on a few pounds since marrying jaz, damn birth control patches. Honestly though, it was the only way I could gain ANY weight, high metabolism stuff.

jaz likes the cleavage and the way I actually have an ass now, he sure does like those one pair of jeans...
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Old 4th December 2005, 06:24   #39
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wow, i'm a nympho.
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Old 4th December 2005, 09:57   #40
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Quote:
Shy said
...high metabolism stuff.
If you've got any to spare, I could use some. And if you want a little more ass, you can have some of mine.
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