Scotland is Worthless

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:20

Yes this is an epiphany I had over the last month- Scotland has given civilization nothing great and world reknown- paintings, architecture, language, government. Yet everyone brags of their lineage to whatever clan and William Wallace. All they did in history is get in the way of a civilization that actually had an agenda, before being assimilated by that civilization.

IMHO, Scotland is probably the most over-hyped culture in existence. Not to mention the one with the least fashion sense and the worst traditional food.

Who's with me?

hestermofet · 16th December 2002, 10:24

FOOL!

BLASPHEMER!

HAVE YE NOT HEARD OF ADAM SMITH, YE SUBVERSIVE CUR?

:-)

binary hero · 16th December 2002, 10:25

bagpipes and men in skirts

(*waits for zootm and prodangle)

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:26

Quote:

Originally posted by hestermofet
[B]
HAVE YE NOT HEARD OF ADAM SMITH, YE SUBVERSIVE CUR?

:-)

The way I look at it, he was more English than scottish. But I will concede that point. :-x

hestermofet · 16th December 2002, 10:26

Quote:

Originally posted by binary hero
bagpipes and men in skirts

Yes, men in klits. I mean kilts. Men in kilts.

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:31

Quote:

Originally posted by binary hero
bagpipes and men in skirts

There you have it, the most obnoxious wind instrument combined with the most nauseous site.

Mr Jones · 16th December 2002, 10:32

'Nuff said

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:33

Isn't alcohol the opposite of civilization?

Widdykats · 16th December 2002, 10:35

The Scottish people have great dogs, Sean Connery and
"The House of zootm", who made my hat.

Mr Jones · 16th December 2002, 10:37

Technically not Scottish, but he wanted to be, you can tell...

hestermofet · 16th December 2002, 10:44

Hey, at least they're not as bad as Australia, whose only contribution to mankind was John Hopoate

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:45

Engines, Mr, Scott!
Ya canna change the laws of physics
laws of physics
laws of physics
Ya canna change the laws of physics
laws of physics, Jim!!!

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 10:45

Quote:

Originally posted by hestermofet
Hey, at least they're not as bad as Australia, whose only contribution to mankind was John Hopoate

I take it Yahoo Serious is not considered a contribution?

Widdykats · 16th December 2002, 10:51

Look at that face!

fwgx · 16th December 2002, 10:51

Perhaps not, but they have made plenty a buck out of daft American tourists and 'scientists' looking for a giant brontosauraus

hestermofet · 16th December 2002, 10:52

Quote:

Originally posted by Xerxes

I take it Yahoo Serious is not considered a contribution?

Good God NO! That would require the USA to claim responsibility for Carrot Top...

Widdykats · 16th December 2002, 11:35

Quote:

Originally posted by hestermofet

Good God NO! That would require the USA to claim responsibility for Carrot Top...

It's early here in New York ,so I just say ahhhh

binary hero · 16th December 2002, 12:04

Quote:

Originally posted by Xerxes
Engines, Mr, Scott!
Ya canna change the laws of physics
laws of physics
laws of physics
Ya canna change the laws of physics
laws of physics, Jim!!!

the same laws of physics that say that you can't travel faster than the speed of light?

(btw, did anyone else see william shatner on V graham norton on friday - that was real comedy

)

Merlin · 16th December 2002, 12:11

Actually, Scotsmen invented the TV and the telephone. Possibly Tarmac and the Radio too. Not bad for a bunch of strange-talking hairy blokes in skirts with only whiskey and ropey women for company in the freezing cold barren wasteland that is Scotland

.

mat · 16th December 2002, 12:13

We look to Scotland for all our ideas of civilisation
- Voltaire

I think this settles it.

Mat.

ujay · 16th December 2002, 12:59

Quote:

Originally posted by watadoo
Did I mention TV? Blechhhhh.

I think you'll find this was invented by a Scotsman

But I'm sure you were referring to the TV programs, rather than the machine you're staring at right this minute.

What have you got against cubicles ?

UJ

binary hero · 16th December 2002, 13:05

Quote:

Originally posted by ujay
I think you'll find this was invented by a Scotsman

he wasn't a scotsman, he was a good liar

zootm · 16th December 2002, 14:54

Quote:

Originally posted by Xerxes
Yes this is an epiphany I had over the last month- Scotland has given civilization nothing great and world reknown- paintings, architecture, language, government. Yet everyone brags of their lineage to whatever clan and William Wallace. All they did in history is get in the way of a civilization that actually had an agenda, before being assimilated by that civilization.

scottish inventions/cultural additions/discoveries: adhesive postage stamps, anaesthetics, antisepsis, artificial diamonds, reaping machine, latent heat, Brownian movement, Buicks, chemical bonds, penicillin, the decimal point, documentary films, Encyclopedia Britannica, engineering sciences, fax machines, first cloned mammal, flailing machines, geosciences, golf, historical novels (in the western world), hypodermic syringes, Kelvin scale, percussion powder, logarithms, Maxwell's equations, marmalade, mackintosh raincoats, macadamized roads, microwave ovens, colloid chemistry, breech-loading rifle, tubular steel, quinine, Sociology, pneumatic tyres, pink bathtubs, hollow pipe drainage, Peter Pan, radar, paleobiology, polarization, cure for scurvy, Halloween, refrigerators, Neptune, bakelite, iron bridges (ok, fat lot of good that did us, we're still painting that fucking thing), the steam engine, telephones, thermos flasks/dewars, the telegraph, television, the stereotype (in printing), sulphuric acid, the steam-hammer, paraffin, Sherlock Holmes (based on a scottish professor, if you were wondering about that one), Toad of Toad Hall, Long John Silver, Jekyll and Hyde, Auld Lang Syne, Whisky, US Navy (founded by a scotsman), Chilean Navy (ditto), Economics (adam smith), Cloud Chamber.

that's after removing the ones i found a little dubious from the list, and not mentioning scottish artists through the years. and adam smith was about as english as i am - he comes from my home town, for the love of god.

(edit)and here's some more... "fun" scottish inventions...
(edit2)i think i missed out the internal combustion engine...

J. Burnaway · 16th December 2002, 15:07

Quote:

Originally posted by zootm
...flailing machines...

I don't know what this does, but it sounds good. Some people just need a good flailing sometimes.

zootm · 16th December 2002, 15:09

Quote:

Originally posted by J. Burnaway
I don't know what this does, but it sounds good. Some people just need a good flailing sometimes.

it was the first mechanical replacement for the hand flail that people used for centuries to husk grain. i was a bit confused by that one at first, too, though.

oh, and i just remembered that scotland has the best centre for artificial intelligence in europe, too. even if it did just burn down.

(edit)and wait... didn't Prolog have a large part of its development done in scotland? not to mention Standard ML!

fwgx · 16th December 2002, 15:21

But the absolute best thing about scotland is that nice big wall between it and England

zootm · 16th December 2002, 15:23

Quote:

Originally posted by Phily Baby
But the absolute best thing about scotland is that nice big wall between it and England

lol! have you ever seen it? it's like a foot high in most places now...

fwgx · 16th December 2002, 15:26

I went when I was pretty small, can still remember it a bit. Seamed big at the time

J. Burnaway · 16th December 2002, 15:37

There have also been a number of great Scottish movies recently, though I can understand about 1 word in 4. Things will be so much better when you Scots learn English.

zootm · 16th December 2002, 15:38

i can see my house from Ard Na Said.

that's about the extent of my gaelic.

Vie · 16th December 2002, 16:19

55% of the worlds invetions come from the UK, the majoriy of which are Scotish

stttafffy · 16th December 2002, 16:29

"helmet remains in contact with the skin as the patient relaxes and slumps in the treatment chair."

Merlin · 16th December 2002, 16:36

Quote:

Originally posted by zootm
pink bathtubs

oh, for joy!

zootm · 16th December 2002, 16:38

Quote:

Originally posted by [Merlin]
oh, for joy!

lol, i meant to take that one out!

the story for that one is "This car is the named after David Dunbar Buick, a Scot who immigrated to the U.S. in 1856. Buick started out as a plumber at age 15, and is credited with developing a method for bonding enamel to cast iron; a process responsible for our blue bathtubs and pink sinks."

also the whole buicks/internal combustion engine link is in that one too...

Sandman2012 · 16th December 2002, 17:21

Quote:

Originally posted by zootm

lol! have you ever seen it? it's like a foot high in most places now...

I've seen it. Hadrian's footstool, anyone?

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 20:28

Quote:

Originally posted by binary hero

the same laws of physics that say that you can't travel faster than the speed of light?

http://angel.scientium.com/special_v...ar_trekkin.htm

Xerxes · 16th December 2002, 20:29

Quote:

Originally posted by zootm

scottish inventions/cultural additions/discoveries: blah blah blah

I take it that list is drilled into your head in grade school so you can mentally copy and paste it when these situations arise?

In my original question, I kind of meant "scotland" as a seperate entity- not after the assimilation into the UK when it became a cultural group and not a nation, as then I see it as an "English Empire" achievement. But OK.

Bilbo Baggins · 16th December 2002, 20:35

I like Scotland, but from the tone of his posts, I reckon that zootm is painted blue now

John M · 16th December 2002, 20:37

well the scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evenin' fair....

hestermofet · 16th December 2002, 20:57

Quote:

Originally posted by binary hero
the same laws of physics that say that you can't travel faster than the speed of light?

"That's impossible. You can't go faster than the speed of light."
"Of course not! That's why scientists increased the speed of light in 2208."

Lord help me, I think I've downloaded one too many Futurama episodes

16th December 2002, 10:20	#1
Xerxes Capitalist Alumni Join Date: May 2000 Location: my 4 Houses on Park Place Posts: 8,687	Scotland is Worthless Yes this is an epiphany I had over the last month- Scotland has given civilization nothing great and world reknown- paintings, architecture, language, government. Yet everyone brags of their lineage to whatever clan and William Wallace. All they did in history is get in the way of a civilization that actually had an agenda, before being assimilated by that civilization. IMHO, Scotland is probably the most over-hyped culture in existence. Not to mention the one with the least fashion sense and the worst traditional food. Who's with me?

16th December 2002, 10:24	#2
hestermofet Major Dude Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 1,763	FOOL! BLASPHEMER! HAVE YE NOT HEARD OF ADAM SMITH, YE SUBVERSIVE CUR? :-) For the freedom to express myself in my own way without fear of being censored or banned.

16th December 2002, 10:35	#9
Widdykats The Forum Slut Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: A place that invites a post pumping whore from NY Posts: 15,579	The Scottish people have great dogs, Sean Connery and "The House of zootm", who made my hat. Ooh, Gabardine

16th December 2002, 10:44	#11
hestermofet Major Dude Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 1,763	Hey, at least they're not as bad as Australia, whose only contribution to mankind was John Hopoate For the freedom to express myself in my own way without fear of being censored or banned.

16th December 2002, 10:51	#14
Widdykats The Forum Slut Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: A place that invites a post pumping whore from NY Posts: 15,579	Look at that face! Ooh, Gabardine

16th December 2002, 10:25	#3
binary hero Banned Join Date: Jun 2001 Posts: 7,004	bagpipes and men in skirts (*waits for zootm and prodangle)

16th December 2002, 10:32	#7
Mr Jones Nothing to say... Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: UK Posts: 23,020	'Nuff said

16th December 2002, 10:33	#8
Xerxes Capitalist Alumni Join Date: May 2000 Location: my 4 Houses on Park Place Posts: 8,687	Isn't alcohol the opposite of civilization?

16th December 2002, 10:37	#10
Mr Jones Nothing to say... Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: UK Posts: 23,020	Technically not Scottish, but he wanted to be, you can tell...

16th December 2002, 10:45	#12
Xerxes Capitalist Alumni Join Date: May 2000 Location: my 4 Houses on Park Place Posts: 8,687	Engines, Mr, Scott! Ya canna change the laws of physics laws of physics laws of physics Ya canna change the laws of physics laws of physics, Jim!!!

16th December 2002, 10:51	#15
fwgx Rudolf the Red. (Forum King) Join Date: Nov 2000 Posts: 9,315	Perhaps not, but they have made plenty a buck out of daft American tourists and 'scientists' looking for a giant brontosauraus .: fwgx.co.uk.:.My art:. "We think science is interesting and if you disagree, you can fuck off."

16th December 2002, 12:11	#19
Merlin ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ (Forum King) Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Manchester Posts: 4,209	Actually, Scotsmen invented the TV and the telephone. Possibly Tarmac and the Radio too. Not bad for a bunch of strange-talking hairy blokes in skirts with only whiskey and ropey women for company in the freezing cold barren wasteland that is Scotland . as he faced the sun, he cast no shadow __________________

16th December 2002, 12:13	#20
mat Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2000 Posts: 1	Voltaire We look to Scotland for all our ideas of civilisation - Voltaire I think this settles it. Mat.

16th December 2002, 15:21	#26
fwgx Rudolf the Red. (Forum King) Join Date: Nov 2000 Posts: 9,315	But the absolute best thing about scotland is that nice big wall between it and England .: fwgx.co.uk.:.My art:. "We think science is interesting and if you disagree, you can fuck off."

16th December 2002, 15:26	#28
fwgx Rudolf the Red. (Forum King) Join Date: Nov 2000 Posts: 9,315	I went when I was pretty small, can still remember it a bit. Seamed big at the time .: fwgx.co.uk.:.My art:. "We think science is interesting and if you disagree, you can fuck off."

16th December 2002, 15:37	#29
J. Burnaway Forum King Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: California, USA Posts: 2,537	There have also been a number of great Scottish movies recently, though I can understand about 1 word in 4. Things will be so much better when you Scots learn English.

16th December 2002, 15:38	#30
zootm Forum King Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: the nether reaches of bonnie scotland Posts: 13,378	i can see my house from Ard Na Said. that's about the extent of my gaelic.

16th December 2002, 16:19	#31
Vie Forum King Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Thoron fields and Duranium shadows. Posts: Crap mostly Posts: 7,960	55% of the worlds invetions come from the UK, the majoriy of which are Scotish Member most in need of SpellCheck Lifetime Achievement Award Vie's Scratching Post

16th December 2002, 16:29	#32
stttafffy Major Dude Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: the ether Posts: 1,059	"helmet remains in contact with the skin as the patient relaxes and slumps in the treatment chair." In space no one can hear you scream.

16th December 2002, 20:35	#38
Bilbo Baggins Wind Chime of the Apocalypse Join Date: May 2000 Location: The Forest Posts: 17,231	I like Scotland, but from the tone of his posts, I reckon that zootm is painted blue now

16th December 2002, 20:37	#39
John M Puts the Cuss in General Discussions (Forum King) Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Cincy, Ohio Posts: 3,624	well the scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evenin' fair.... missyob made me post this.

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